:: Poetry ::

What Happens?

What happens when you've found the one;
the proverbial 'apple of your eye';
the girl that drives all of your dreams
and outshines the stars in the sky?

What happens when your worries fade
at the mere sound of a word
muttered or whispered or spoken aloud -
felt like a feeling and not just heard?

What happens when you reach out your hand
and though you're miles and miles apart
you can feel the soft caress of her cheek
and the warm, sweet passion of her heart?

What happens when that girl for you
is 'the girl' for someone else as well?
What happens when, for want of respect
she's the last person you'd ever tell?

And what do I do now
with this heart that's torn
'tween passive and agressive;
between forgiving and forlorn?

What happens next?
What happens now?
Does the curtain close on this show?
Should I take my final bow?

Is it time for a casting call
to fill this empty place?
Why must I dream
and always see her face?

What does happen next?
What does happen now?
Do I wait for her the rest of my life
to take my wedding vows?

Or do I pack up the show?
Move out and move on.
Is it best that I don't know
or at least better once I am gone?

Ya know, she once said she liked my poetry
With that, her love she did imbue
upon my unsuspecting heart
a feeling so incredibly new.

In fact, 'what happens' has never been an issue
'What IS' is what its all about
and I can say that I love her for all that I know
fore I know I could never go without.

Dream

I had a dream about you again last night.
It was the kind that doesnt fade.
It was the kind that forges brand new feelings
And where timeless love is made.

It started with us just lying there
Sharing casual pillow talk, enshrowded in wonder
As we held one another oh so close
one hand to caress, one supporting from under.

Your face... it was different
But I still knew it was you
Fore I knew I loved whomever it was
And whomever it was loved me too.

I remember feeling
like I had found a long lost friend
or that I had stumbled into an emotion
that I wished would never end.

And while I did,
In fact, eventually wake,
As I said before
That memory I did take.

That wasn't though
exactly where it stopped
There was one more thought
before the whole matter was dropped.

It was daytime and show time
for some event for which you had control
over the many assembled guests there,
from the tiniest little pieces, to the giant, entire whole.

You were preparing to make your speech
from behind a heavily guarded door
through which I glided so simply through
casting away problems in search of something more.

And there it was before me.
It was you, so perfectly right.
standing against the darkness
glowing a sybolic light.

You said, "How did you get in here?
You'll be in trouble if you're caught."
I said, "Let them come. Let them try.
Fore I have found what I once sought."

I guess - the point of it all
was that I see a new life in you.
One in which I am no longer scared
to stick it all out and see it all through.

And I guess if a dream can predict the future
Then my future is looking bright
And though predictions may falter
I still look forward to my dreams tonight.

What Did I Do?

What did I do to deserve all of this?
Held without bail in my dream of a kiss.
I have longed for so long just to be in your thoughts
A string of memories all tied up in knots.
You're happy, you're comfortable, you're all that - thats fine.
But your lack of committment denies me of mine.
A committment to understanding; pity, if you will.
Fore these dreams of you do haunt me still.
To hear of your adventures - surely you can see
That your adventures are my losses, fore they're adventures without me.
It pains me to say it, but the old addage is true;
That ignorance is bliss, if I am ignorant of you.
And I dont want it to sound like I just plain don't care,
Though given the choice, I'd choose to be there.
But my time with you is over. It came and it went.
My only choice now is to move on - forgive and repent.
And be it behind money, or love, or lifestyle I hide,
I know I'll never be complete without you by my side.

Ode to the Passing Lane

The 30's are the new 20's
Or that's what they say
So then why can't the 70's
Be the new 50's on the highway?

It seems that folks have forgotten the rules
Or maybe its that they just don't know
That the LEFT lane is for passing
And the RIGHT for going slow.

In fact - that's what the left's name was
At least back when I was a kid
The 'Passing Lane' was it's name
Fore in it, passing people is what you did.

But now the game has flip-flopped.
If you're passing, the right's where you want to be
And the left if you're just travelling with traffic
Maintaining a painfully steady Fifty-Three.

Don't motor-vehiclists realize
That that's where "Stop & Go" starts?
That traffic is the product of idiots
Who still think cell phones are state-of-the-art?

They think, "Hey, this is nice.
This lane is free and clear.
So is that other one, but I don't wanna bother;
I'm going fast enough, I'll just stay right here."

Do these people even realize
What that mirror glued to their windshield is for?
The "REAR-VIEW" mirror, I think it's called
Nevermind those ones attached to the doors.

Well, TAKE A FUCKING LOOK BEHIND YOU.
See that line a mile long?
Or that guy who's riding so far up your ass,
You'd swear you were wearing a thong?

Well, here's some news - he wants to pass you.
You and your car are in the wrong place.
Flip on your directional and get the fuck over
And occupy a more appropriate space.

Oh, Passing Lane, how I miss you.
You're almost all but dead and gone
And I fear this ode may be a eulogy
Though to me your teachings live on.

Just a Message

Justifiably waiting in wonder
Uttering out from under
Slightly laughing at the lightning, but still
Terrified of the thunder

See the rain as it crashes down
Annoyed by all but the sound
You wonder why I close my eyes
I hear, not see, the rain hit the ground

Never question, without a thought
Grab the truth, not what is not
Heed the words of love I sing and
I will find what I sought.

Day at a Time

The question we ask isn't what, its why.
And the answer that question we keep inside.
So if you feel like crying.
Just look to the sky.

Cuz I don't have the answers to everything.
My only release is to dance and sing
and the dream that we vowed to dream
has gotten to be too much it seems.

I once wondered where I'd be
When I turned twenty three
but 24 came then 25
I'm surprised I'm still alive.

One day at a time
isnt that what they say?
Take it in stride, it'll be okay.
One day at a time
and we'll be just fine.

Responsi-Bull

This is my life and my life aint goin' nowhere
'No' would be the answer if you asked me if I cared
The sun still shines and lights up almost every day
I still don't know which is the right and wrong way.

My life is a challenge that I'm willing to take
Every move I make, every move I make, every move I make
Just because there's problems, it doesn't mean I'm gonna break.
Every move I make, every move I make, every move I make

It can make ya
It can break ya,
It could take you a long time
to figure out the right words,
But for the wrong rhyme

My Life is mine.

Hey baby, what's your sign?

Mine is the leo, the lion, the king.
The truth be told, that don't mean a thing.
I can see it in your eyes,
You've lived all the lies
of the sun and the moon and the stars in the skies.
In our ever present quest to be wise…

We've forgotten our lives.

Make every move you make
like its gonna be your last one;
Like holding your head, your head to a gun,
and with a gun to your head,
you'll wind up dead;

never able to see the sun

or able to run and have fun,
and I'll be damned, I'll be damned if you're the one
that everyone will have said
that you would last.

And your past is back
for one final attack
as you step to the plate,
you hear the crack of the bat.
And that's that.

That's that.

I hope you understand,
that's not what I got planned,
cuz my castle's still strong,
and my army still stands
and even though my feet
are sinking in the sand…

There's still a way out
There'll be a branch or a vine
or someone'll come
just in time
to save me from my grave…

but I ain't nobody's slave.

Nor am I above being wrong
or being below, because I am strong
and every move I make
I believe will belong

So my life it would seem
is not like a dream,
or at least not a storybook theme.
So I smoke me a bowl
to relinquish control
of the overworked engine of my soul

and as I sit back and relax,
I take a look at the facts
I've avoided most cracks
and left my pain in my tracks
and realize that my life
is just fine.
on that food for thought
I sit there and dine
and contemplate
the responsibility that is mine.

Inward Inertia Prologue

These songs are just stories
of lives that I've lived.
An inward inertia
that I've failed to forgive

A need that nags at me
to return what I've taken
from the dreams in my head
that I seem to have forsaken

This need to expand,
this push, this drive.
Are these not the reasons
for which we're alive?

And if not,
then what for?
Do we trudge through our days
simply to endure?

well not this kid.
Ive got bigger plans
With this inward inertia
I'll make the world understand.

Nickspeare

The old arts are gone.
Love cries out its name,
yet no-one feigns to care
Passion and emotion have given way
into a blinding storm
These days that I have held
so precious to my heart now tear at me.
These words, mere explinations
of things still left undone.
These thoughts, echos of dreams dreamt
and stories spun.
And these tears, thousands by the count
fall and dry,
ready to be used again.

A new day will come,
and yet another when
the masters of our day
will arise and reclaim our lives
and then and only then
will my mind be at peace.

And Romeo, Romeo,
where for art thou now Romeo?
When to love and live for another
is a crime.
Have these splendid sensations
been lost with time?
And that love, that Juliet
that being of light.
Have virtue and freedom
been swallowed by fright?
What has happened to the world we know?
Is it not now
our feelings we fore-go?
All the drive-by eyeings
and the winks at the bar.
A look that sends the mind flying
if only a look from afar.

Come in, sit down
welcome to the day,
when what you mean
isn't what you say.
Nor is it ever
what you truly feel,
fore these days
nothing is real.
When people are pampered
prodded and poked.
When whats true to one man
is to another a joke.
Hurded like cattle-
this way and that.
Your life could end
at the drop of a hat.

Pity

So what do you think you know about me?
Am I a reflection of your ego-loathing personality?
You wanna fight me? Belittle and indite me?
Yo fuck that, I ain't goin there 'G'
I gave you all the chances
That you took and threw away
I'm leaving you alone now,
But I got one thing left to say
Don't pity me, don't spite me
Don't play me like a pawn
Fore what I gave you was heaven,
And you'll miss it when it's gone.
I'm in your thoughts. I'm in your mind.
I'll stay with you for forever and a day.

Road Rage

I just wish every once in a while
That I'd find a driver that makes me smile
One who knows you need to signal to turn
And that doesn't make me crash and BURN.

Those bastards drive faster
Just to pass you for fun
Then they stay in that lane
What a fuckin pain,
What I wouldn't give for a gun!

A passing lane is for passing,
Not driving fifty-five
If you want to drive that slow,
Don't drive in front of me!

Cause I got road rage
At such a young age
I shouldn't be this uptight
But at least I know how to drive alright
I got road rage
At such a young age
Get the hell outta my way
Why do I have to deal with this every day?

Social Blasphemy

Honor comes with virtue.
Virtue comes with zeal.
And all of that comes with fries and a coke
In my extra-value meal.

So eat it up
And drink it up,
Place faith in a neon god
'cause religion is out dated
And our president's a fraud

Our way of life has gone to shit.
Love and friendship and all of it,
And all I can do is pray and sit
And watch it all go by.

And I ask myself
Why?
Why me?
Why do I have to deal
With this social blasphemy?

The Fortune Teller

Once upon a time,
In a land far away,
I met a man
who had this to say:

Be true to yourself
Because noone else
ever will.

That very same man
I had heard died alone
Never knowing love
or a happy home

You'll see all of the lies
Don't make men wise
or free.

When its just me
And noone else
Its just me
And noone else
Eyes wide open, but I still can't see
When its just me.

One sunny day
I met a beggar with bare feet
He charged me a toll
for walking on his street.

And who am I to complain?
When I can't imagine his pain
or plight.

In this world
of questions to answers
we have become
devils and dancers

And the question still holds true
Am I supposed to be like you?
or just be?

When its just me
And noone else
Its just me
And noone else
Eyes wide open, but I still can't see
When its just me.

Better Friends

Well, our story starts
At points worlds apart,
But by chance we met in a bar.

I was feeling fine
Just drinking my wine
When I noticed him noticing me from afar.

We sat and talked about our lives
And how we liked Sunday drives
And all the cute things that make people real
And then he asked me how I'd feel

About being with him,
And on a whim,
I said "yeah, why the hell not?"

And though our love did grow,
I just don't know
When those feelings we had
Were forgot.

Through our lives we ran;
Me and this man,
And he gave me flowers almost every day

Though they were sweet,
On life's street,
We forgot to stop and smell them on the way.

Well he sang me a song
And then he asked me
To marry him.

Yet the words I replied -
Oh how I tried -
Not to let them bury him.

With the knowledge
That I would refuse,
Refuse his name.

Though sad as it may seem,
When you follow your dreams,
You may find that yours and theirs aren't the same.

"Are you hurt?" I said,
but then he shook his head
as if to say that, say he was fine.

But when I looked in his eyes
I discovered his disguise
As the tears started to well up in mine.

"I know your love is strong,
you sung it in your song,
but there was one thing you just couldn't see.

That's that our love was fine
Once upon a time,
But for now, it's friends we'd better be.

This is hard for me too
Because I do love you,
But I think that we would find out in the end,

That its not all that great
When you find out too late
That we were better as friends.

Well a year has passed
Since we spoke last;
When I left him hurt and confused.

The love he gave
I'll take to my grave,
And my memories of him I'll never abuse.

I can only pray
That he'll win the day
And that he smiles when he thinks of me.

In a solitary thought
I remember what I was taught -
That out of friends or lovers…
It's friends you'd better be.

In a solitary thought
I remember what I was taught -
That out of friends or lovers…
It's friends you'd better be.

Unspoken Word

As my soul ignites into a blaze of emotion,
Your eyes deepen into the darkest blue of the deepest ocean,
As do mine as I dream of passion, love and desire.
The things that have so often fueled this fire.

I stood there and stared at you, your every look shook my world.
Your words telling stories of tales yet untold,
Your hair draped gently like silken strands.
A face so beautiful- as if created by God's own hand.

To touch you, to hold you, to feel your heart beat next to mine-
These are wondrous things, but none quite as divine
As to know you, and be you- to explore your mind.
A fortune in feelings I think we'd find.

You tear down the walls that keep me inside,
Leaving me with no reason to fear, no reason to hide.
You grant me my freedom, and as it floods from the dam,
I'm given leave to finally be who I am.

And I to you would be a saint.
I'd render your image with canvas and paint.
I'd part mountains, I'd drain the seas,
I'd do anything for you if it was what you pleased.

I'd ask for nothing in return but a smile,
And the knowledge that I'm thinking of you all the while,
And that every now and then you'd think of me too,
Remember these words and know they are true.

And now with time against us and ticking away-
If it were up to me I'd have you stay.
But it's not, and with Father Time my constant foe,
My heart beats out the hours until the time you must go.

I mourn for the loss of something yet unfound,
But revel in the hopes of hearing a different sound
That indicated correspondence; my words spoken by you.
Truths among many, engaging your thoughts through and through…

Untainted

Some would say I grew up too fast.
That my treasured youth just didn't last.
And now that I am older, I need a release
To find that elusive, inner peace

So with antennae on my head
and a smile on my face
I venture out into this
wild and wonderous place.

But now my path is clear to me
I must go back and take what's mine
The obstacles have all been hurdled
and now's my time to shine.

And I try to make my days worth living
and I can say I'm doing quite well
Cuz I focus on love and I focus on laughter
far after the time when living was hell.

A kid at heart & a leader by sign
A playful lion I be fore the Leo be mine
Yet arrogance I lack as it drives people away
and people are what I need to get through my day.

Bliss is a smile from a stranger or friend
the danger of love is that someday it might end.
But I live by the code that love never dies
And that true love can only be seen through untainted eyes.

Up On The Mountain That Day

Opening my eyes to a dream of you
Standing still is the only way to move
Stopping to smell the air along the way
Like I did up on the mountain that day.
Impressions and regressions as I walk along
My company: a walking stick and a song
The leaves in the tress, the dew from the dawn
A solitary doe and her newborn fawn
The leaves crackle and crunch, eroding under foot
The signs of a campfire marked by soot
Too many wonders to either remember or say
All the wonderful sights I saw up on the mountain that day.

When We Went Walking
for Danielle, and a friendship lost.

Do you remember all the days gone by?
When us, meant you and I?
And the birds of our youth still flew,
And when I went walking with you?

Or all the summers we spent
Singing songs of sweet lament
For all of the days of school that were through,
And when I went walking with you?

Ya know, you're never who you used to be,
But if you would, just walk with me-
Again my heart and soul would sing.
Just like when we went walking.

Do you remember when we would go for a ride
On our bikes to the beach, just to watch the tide?
There's nothing so great, as the ocean is blue,
Except for when I went walking with you.

When time was a nuisance, to which we ignored.
Never going backward, always moving forward.
Beating like a drum, steady and true,
Beating to our footsteps as I went walking with you.

Necessity and distance have torn us apart,
Though you'll always own that piece of my heart.
But we could meet again, you see.
And if we do, will you still walk with me?

The times we've shared will never be
Shared again by you and me.
So let us start some times anew,
And once again I'll walk with you.

Ya know, you're never who you used to be,
But if you would, just walk with me-
Again my heart and soul would sing!
Just like when we went walking.

Who, Me?

I'm an "alien"
Yes I guess that's the word
For it, but it
All seems so absurd
To think that I drink
From the same cup as you
When we're ALL drinking
From the very same brew.
You sit there and say
"I'm a human, hooray!"
But think of what that implies
When all you know
Is what they choose to show
And your only truth is what's
In front of your eyes
How do you think you got here?
Spontaneous symbiotic life?
I got news for you G
The word on the street
That war doesn't sound symbiotic
And the plumber's fucking your wife
Yes, you've got lasers in the jungle
Lasers in the jungle somewhere
But there are species that would crush this puny planet
Without the slightest care.